i'll be thoughtlessly frank and say...
... that i am losing steam. what should have been as an energizer vacation, turned out to be something detrimental to me. there are days when i seem to be lethargic and unresponsive. at the same time, there are days, too, that i seem to be hyperactive and very reactive (i even had the guts to walk out on some of my officemates). maybe because all i really want is to just go motorcycling around dumaguete.
... that i sorely miss the dumaguete i knew on my own. i've always associated dumaguete with family. being there -- walking around and seeing things by myself -- is quite a wonderful experience. and i miss that. for the first time (and this is something very new to me) i think i'm considering living there in the future.
... that i am quite sensitive the past few days. there's this deep emotional and physical longing for something that i can't have for myself when and where i want it (which i always think should be the case). sometimes, in my solitude, i let these emotions take the lead and the feeling is something that of losing something.
... that i am quite tired of waiting and having never beenpatient a fan of waiting, the days are dreadfully dragging. it's like the routine that i'm used to is getting old and i'm getting old. everything just becomes so familiar and so normal. i'm aware that i've been really attempting to bring back some normalcy in my life but this... oh this!
... that i am looking forward to an occassion where i can really get drunk without having the attitude of someone drunk. i just want to remember being bold, brazen, unabashed, and undaunted. something spontaneous and something unexpected.
... that i am still thankful for all these. these keep me grounded. these keep me on my feet. these keep me busy. these validate my existence.
... that the chicken has crossed the road and is happy to have found something beautiful.
... that i have finally started to take notice of my physical self. i started yoga and do some fifty push-ups everyday. i also started jogging around the park after office (i just hope i can keep this up). seeing ungodly pictures of myself without a shirt on finally pushed me to be serious is being healthy and fit. i am cutting down on my cigarettes (woopee!) but i am still eating whatever i like. i guess, no one can ever deny me of food.
... i am done.
ciao
... that i am losing steam. what should have been as an energizer vacation, turned out to be something detrimental to me. there are days when i seem to be lethargic and unresponsive. at the same time, there are days, too, that i seem to be hyperactive and very reactive (i even had the guts to walk out on some of my officemates). maybe because all i really want is to just go motorcycling around dumaguete.
... that i sorely miss the dumaguete i knew on my own. i've always associated dumaguete with family. being there -- walking around and seeing things by myself -- is quite a wonderful experience. and i miss that. for the first time (and this is something very new to me) i think i'm considering living there in the future.
... that i am quite sensitive the past few days. there's this deep emotional and physical longing for something that i can't have for myself when and where i want it (which i always think should be the case). sometimes, in my solitude, i let these emotions take the lead and the feeling is something that of losing something.
... that i am quite tired of waiting and having never been
... that i am looking forward to an occassion where i can really get drunk without having the attitude of someone drunk. i just want to remember being bold, brazen, unabashed, and undaunted. something spontaneous and something unexpected.
... that i am still thankful for all these. these keep me grounded. these keep me on my feet. these keep me busy. these validate my existence.
... that the chicken has crossed the road and is happy to have found something beautiful.
... that i have finally started to take notice of my physical self. i started yoga and do some fifty push-ups everyday. i also started jogging around the park after office (i just hope i can keep this up). seeing ungodly pictures of myself without a shirt on finally pushed me to be serious is being healthy and fit. i am cutting down on my cigarettes (woopee!) but i am still eating whatever i like. i guess, no one can ever deny me of food.
... i am done.
ciao
No comments:
Post a Comment