forgive me

i screwed up.

i know.

how could i ever forget when all that i remember is that one fateful day. and each time that i do, my pulse races and my breathing, uncontrollable. how many times do i have to say "i'm sorry?" remembering it is torture enough. thinking about how i should get along is sheer madness... something that i myself could never fathom.

for the many times i screwed up, again, i am truly sorry. if i could just pick up the pieces and move forward. then again, for every piece that i pick up, i am broken a thousand times more. to carry on is suicide.

i am tired. everything exhausts me. i absolutely have no clue as to how i can go. as much as i want to break free from this, this madness, this torture, this hell, all roads still go back to that day - to you. for the very first time in my life, i want to take everything back; fast rewind everything, undo everything.

don't give me reasons to not want you for as crazy as it may appear, i'll still go through that same ride with you. and frankly, that's all i want.

i'm sorry i screwed everything up.