bryan 101

bryan 101

ummm, let's see. let's do this impromptu. whatever i feel like saying, i'll put it here. this should be interesting.

1. i felt the worst about myself when i did bad on my revalida. i thought i knew everything i should know but it turned out that i really don't.

2. i feel good that i was able to redeem myself on my second revalida.

3. lately, i've been REALLY wanting a love life but it just would not come. there are prospects but not sure. well, maybe leaning more on the NOT REALLY.

4. i LOVE my office mates. really. they're just the coolest.

5. i LOVE what i'm doing right now with work, but honestly, i just don't see myself being there for a really long time.

6. i hate that i don't know what i want in life.

7. i hate that i think i have a plan when i really know that i don't.

8. in meeting with friends, i'm usually late. in first time meetings and business meetings, i'm freaking too early.

9. walking along edsa going to work just disgusts me. and tires me. so much that i always think of resigning before going to work.

10. my mornings are usually crappy because of the long walk beside smoke-belching buses.

11. doing nothing at home is my hobby.

12. i hate doing nothing at home.

13. i'm a very complicated person. never ask me why.

14. the story of my love life is this. i like the person. i befriend the person. we end up being best friends. period.

15. i like the concept of being anonymous.

16. i am vain.

17. i am very concerned about my receding hairline and my balding crown.

18. i secretly wish i could have it surgerized. if there's such a word.

19. i love that i love to read.

20. i always wanna look good. even though i know i look like shit most of the time.

21. i'm not sure if people find me cute, or good looking, and sometimes it brings out my insecurities.

22. i like being in the center of attention for just a brief moment.

23. i don't like being in the center of attention for a long time.

24. nobody understands the fact that i'm almost 24 and my mother would still help me out financially.

25. i see that as a weakness.

26. i don't like being weak.

27. i give off an aura of indepence and strength but sometimes when i'm not in that stage, people find me fake. so it goes around.

28. i don't like confrontations. arguments, when i'm really affected, makes me cry. that's so gay, i know. i'd rather be writing what i feel whether through a letter or, in venting my frustrations, through my blog.

29. i like to correct people about almost anything, sometimes candidly, sometimes privately. it depends. and some people don't just get it. some find it funny.

30. when i do house chores, i NEED to do it slowly. i have to do everything all at once but more often than not, by the time i got everything fixed in my head, i'm too lazy to do it.

31. i smoke a lot these days. before, i used to say that i can quit it when i want to but i just don't want to. but now, i'm scared that i can no longer quit.

32. i secretly envy people i know only because of financial stability. but, don't we all?

33. i hate reading texts, blogs, e-mails, and shiznits that are infested with bad grammar and wrong spelling.

34. sometimes, i'm also a victim of wrong grammar and spelling and in my mind, i beat myself up for it.

35. i really wish i could write profound sentences that make all the sense in the world.

36. i want all the latest gadgets and gizmos. but just thinking of spending hundreds, thousands of pesos for one already makes me not want it.

37. i wish i could save, but with the salary i'm getting, it's just enough to pay for the bills.

38. i hate that being a graduate of dlsu-manila with a fairly good grade got me nowhere. nowhere with a salary that can pay for my bills AND capriciousness.

39. i don't like labels, stereotypes, and prejudices. the concept of typecasting people into those types just disgusts me. although i know it just makes things easier if we all do that.

40. i am loud at times. irritating at times. over the top at times, but i know where to draw the line.

41. i am so freaking proud. of what i am proud of, i don't have a clue.

42. i really find it weird and confusing when people find me cute, good looking, etc. although i secretly want it, i still shrug it off.

43. i love my mother sooo much that i wish she would just stop working and be happy. but i know in my heart that if she does, i will be terribly affected. and i hate that it's true.

44. eating is one of the many pleasures in life. i take extreme pleasure in it and extreme slowness in doing it as well.

45. before i thought i was romantic. but when the time came to be romantic, i was too chicken to do it. lol.

46. the only, ONLY, relationship i had was this: courtship for almost 3 months and being together for, err, i'm really not sure but the shortest i'm thinking is 2 weeks and the longest i'm guessing is a month. you can stop laughing.

47. i know that chatting over ym is better if you've just met.

48. i like the peace and solace of the night or when i'm at home alone.

49. most of the time, i'd rather be watching movies than stay out all night partying. but if i'm with many of my closest friends, sometimes, it's good to drink all night and be wasted.

50. which leads me to this, i've never been really wasted since high school.

51. i've tried marijuana and valiums.

52. and i told my mother about it.

53. and she just told me this: "it's up to you. everyone undergoes that stage. you're old enough to know what's right"

54. after that, i never touched marijuana again. i know, it's this reverse psychology thing that only mothers can use on their children. i use valiums for its intended purpose only and that is to sleep.

55. writing numbered facts about myself is the easiest way for me to blog and make it semi-interesting.

56. i like it when people tell me that they like me in a not best-friend-y way. but i don't like it when they like me already. unless, i like them, too. define awkwardness.

57. in my previous work, there were four people who said those three words to me seriously. that was the ickiest feeling i could ever get. godamnit, i can't even tell that to my own mother.

58. as of this writing, there are drunk men on the streets singing bamboo's 'hallelujah.' right before that, they were singing happy birthday. those freakin (*@%^&*(! (i just had the urge to mention that)

59. i want this to reach a hundred but i'm just too lazy to add more. maybe till the next ish.

ciao!