the ac story

the ac story

and it's not even the school. my aircon has finally given up on existing almost three weeks ago. i don't even want to complain about it. i have no right since i am in no financial stability to replace it. yup, i can't sleep properly. the only thing that i'm thankful for is that he has given up on me when i don't have to get some sleep. for that and the memories, too, my very (very, very) worn and beloved aircon, thanks.

in case you wanna know, this aircon has been with us since my kinder years. i'm working now. IMAGINE THAT! i'll wager my whole bank account (or what's left of it) that they don't even manufacture or even sell that kind of aircon anymore. even 10 years ago. ha. ha. ha. fedders. gawd. but it's cool that he proved himself to be a tough one.

yun lang. bow.

ciao!

another suitcase in another hall

another suitcase in another hall

I don't expect my love affairs to last for long
Never fool myself that my dreams will come true
Being used to trouble I anticipate it
But all the same I hate it -- wouldn't you?

So what happens now?
Another suitcase in another hall
So what happens now?
Take your picture off another wall
Where am I going to?
You'll get by, you always have before
Where am I going to?

Time and time again I've said that I don't care
That I'm immune to gloom, that I'm hard through and through
But every time it matters all my words desert me
So anyone can hurt me -- and they do

So what happens now?
Another suitcase in another hall
So what happens now?
Take your picture off another wall
Where am I going to?
You'll get by you always have before
Where am I going to?

Call in three months time and I'll be fine I know
Well maybe not that fine, but I'll survive anyhow
I won't recall the names and places of this sad occasion
But that's no consolation -- here and now

So what happens now?
Another suitcase in another hall
So what happens now?
Take your picture off another wall
Where am I going to?
You'll get by, you always have before
Where am I going to?
Don't ask anymore

ash wed

ash wednesday

i went to mass just today. i haven't even planned it. i heard that it was ash wednesday today and i thought i should go. i guess someone above sent me pam to ask if i was going to hear mass. said i did. pam, along with two of our friends, came to meet me in greenbelt. but bongga and another friend had to leave. as per bongga , said in jest "ayoko magsimba, masusunog ako" so pam and i went ahead to meet sha.

you wouldn't believe the throngs of people inside and around the chapel. i was surprised because there were more people today than every sunday.
when the mass ended we were like sheeps gathered and scattered around the chapel. we could not find our exit. imagine going around the place almost twice just to leave. finally we did, after 15 minutes.
while walking i had a light bulb moment. in a crowd, every individual thinks that they are the lead characters in the story. yun lang.

we ate in avenetto for the nth time again and we met yuri there. we then decided to catch a movie in g4. the epic movie. for all of you planning to watch this, two words: DON'T BOTHER. it is a complete waste of money. cheap laughs. cheap lines. cheap movie. again do not watch. during the movie, all three of them dozed off in most parts of the scenes and i have to be watching because i would not waste my hundred bucks for just nothing. i just had to laugh at their sad and very obvious punchlines. damn.

but i have to say that it was fun being with them. pam, sha, and yuri. we even saw ruffa and mike. thanks guys!

++++++++

i'm getting tired of doing nothing. puhlease. nanglilimos po.


inxs: i don't even know why i'm writing all these. it's as if i have to write something. i know i don't have to. a and another thing, read frank mccourt. both angela's ashes and 'tis. interesting read.

ciao!

DUROG

durog
sabi ng friend ko

it's exactly 2:29 in the morning and i'm wide awake. i've been thinking about what's happenning. there's a lot. i don't like it.

i don't like the fact that i am still financially dependent when i'm fucking 23 years old. i used to be independent for 6 months and that was it. siguro ma-pride lang ako. dahil kung pera lang ang paguusapan, maraming pwedeng trabahong pagkakitaan. answer me this: am i too proud? let's just not say proud. am i still jaded?!
sometimes, during times like these, i often find myself thinking that i am just too jaded to see the reality that i can never be happy AND financially stable at the same time. what's worse, i'm not both. siguro i fail to see the signs. siguro nga, masakit man tanggapin, masyado akong proud. proud to admit that i am nothing in this great mechanic macrocosm. i am just a bacteria. an eenie weenie microscopic bacteria that wants to be something. and that something, i don't even know yet. maybe human.

this prolonged absence from the work force is really getting to my nerves. any mention of work from my friends really hits me big time. i just want to explode. although they would tell me that i'm getting used to this cycle of having and not having a job in jest, i almost always want to explode with things i really want to say. i'm greatly affected. it's as if i'm having the time of my life right now. as if i'm actually enjoying this bumness. this live-for-the-day drama. as if... as if.
lalagyan pa ng asin ang sugat habang sinasabing "buti ka pa may aasahan sa states." WHO THE HELL WOULD STILL WANT TO BE DEPENDENT? at my age, whatever the norm is, i want to be on my own. period.
tapos susundan pa ng isang period. hanggang maging isang ellipsis... pero hindi ko kaya. hindi ko kaya bilang tao.
"bakit hindi ka mag aral ulit"
although i know that my mother loves me to death, i cannot go to school again. i cannot put my mother in the same situation she thought she was done with. and i'm not interested for now either. the day i'll be going back to school will be the day i'm affording my own capriciousness.
tangina. all i can think about is i'm in a rut. in a big rut that i unpurposely dug for myself.
pakshet.

hanggang sa susunod. sumasakit na ulo ko ulit.


ps: i'm chatting with my friend, mimay, and i just concluded that number 1: i'm intellectually promiscuous. number 2: according to mimay, i'm virtually erogenous. sa susunod na ang storya.

fropiles

fropiles

just because i had nothing good to do, i checked out profiles over at friendster. i just clicked away until i found these profiles. interesting *evil laugh* i'm willing to be mean now, so deal with it.

I love to eat kaya nga healthy looking ako & happy ,hehehe...Love is really what makes the world go around.My family and friends nortured me, taught me and contributed to the person I am now.

ahh oo nga, healthy looking. nortured na nortured.

uhm..hw cn I dscribe my self??hirap nmn oh.. :p well..simple gurl lng nmn poh ako...mba8, mejo m hiyaen, ala s kaimek,pero cgurado n pg nag salita my ta2maan (syempre yung tao n kinaiinisan koh)...mejo mdali m pikon and napaka sensitive,..ayaw koh poh s mga tao n mt2as ang pride, super kulet, m aarte, filing npaka importante...and xmpre s mga plastic n tao...

add mo to: ayoko rin ng spelling ko. period. no erase.

im weird,stupid,asshole guy,
chillout wit my dumbass friends drunk together nd fall together hahaha (always toxicated)...
\m/_\m/ pissdrunk

buti nalang toxicated. sana mataas ang toxicity level niyan para... para... dead. (x;x)


>>>>>>Sbe Nga NiLa...don't JudGe d BoOk By it's CoVer...supLada...maLDita...wArfreaK...MaaRte...MhiRap Abutin...SosYaLera...etO yunG mGa KdlasaNg NririniG koNg CommEnts Nila Skin..and whiCh is..noT reaLLy ReaLLy TrUe...Im JaZ a SiMpLe GuRL wiTh An ElegAnt LifestyLe, un Lng...DyOsa Ang
TinGin Pra Sa SriLi...and Im ProuD to Say ThaT...Im Just BeinG Me...As In..Me, MyseLF and I...KuLet Noh?

in fairness ang kulit nga. sosyal ka! sosyaaaaaalll!!!!!


+16 yrs oLd turninG 17 dis mAy..(gift ha..juK)
+standz 5"3 1/2..
+gaL wit long heir and morena type..
+Luv 2 sing ..luv my guitar (na wasak na..kakabalibag=))
+musiclover...yeah yeah..!!
+mhilig sa gimiksz peu strict ang parents ku ha..(takas mowd.)
+adeek sa dubi..(charinng..)
+adeek sa peecee(including games and friendster)...xa text..sa chat..sa music.sau este sau..inde un kasama..=))
+adeek sa picture picture..
+luv c fafa jesus(qea i choose nmn ung mga music n nipa2kinggan cu... luv ang familia my 2madorsz and my other friendsz..(^^)
+fave. ang stik o..talap..
+fave ang color pink and black.^^
+i luv the way iam..^^
+dont have to change my self to please evrybody..
+i hate plastixxx...bakfyterz..
+i hate math..dem!?
+i hate guys n ef n ef lage.:-"
+well f ur interested.. add me..
+********@yahoo.com
yM: ********
+digitsz: ********* hulaa nio n lang^^
+landlyn:4444*** yan din=))
`ennxxx.. guyszz...

ang profile na ito ay isang malaking... JUK.

.....ako si ****
....bumbay kung tawagin
....kilalang crush ng bayan
.....kilabot ng caloocan
......asset ng barkada
......tahimik sa kalokohan
.....gabagyo ang lakas ng sex appeal
....pero...humble po ako...

oonga eh... NOOOOOOOOOOOOH?!?!

simple..pero rOcK! hehe (",) mataray dn dw, sbi ng nkara2mi. but seriously, I am the type of person who loves my family so much and would do anything for them...they are my most important possession..

kawawang pamilya. naturingang kasangkapan. hi. hi. hi.


o sige, ako'y papanaw na muna.

ciao!

.

i was just supposed to post an entry. but right now, I JUST DON'T FEEL THE LOVE.

matalik kong sigarilyo, magkasama nanaman tayo. maglaro tayo sa kawalan. doon tayo magliwaliw. paki tanggal lang ang bawat hibla ng aking kamalyan. iiwanan ko na ito at tatakbo patungo doon sa malayo na parang baliw na preso.

the holiday

kaewanan

grabe gusto ko talaga ng digital slr. pupunta kami ng kaibigan ko sometime this week sa photographer's haven just to window shop and fill their windows with drool. tae.

i watched this nga pala kahapon/kagabi. it's nice. you should see the scene where cameron diaz and jude law are inside the children's "tent." astig.

and one funny part! it's not actually about the movie but one of the ladies behind us. there was a scene where cameron diaz was spying on jude law through a window. and then, when jude law noticed cameron, she immediately hid. not really funny. but when the lady behind us suddenly shrieked. as in humagikgik!!! I. REALLY. CAN. NOT. STOP. LAUGHING. as if siya yung nakita!! maryosep. it was almost two scenes after that when i was still laughing my ass off because of the weird and funny sound she did. basta! you should be there talaga.

ps. i hate it when i write this way.

alam niyo naman po ang sitwasyon ko ngayon. pero alam niyo rin naman po na sa lahat ng mga nangyayari, nakatali pa rin ang pananampalataya ko sa paniniwala na may gagawin kayong maganda sa buhay ko.
maraming salamat po sa binigay ninyong katahimikan sa puso ko. dasal ko lang po ngayon na bigyan niyo ako ng higit pang lakas at linaw ng pag-iisip. dahil minsan, gusto ko man kayong sundin lagi, parang nagdadalawang isip ako. pero sa kabila po ng lahat, kayo pa rin po lagi ang pilit kong sinusunod. lakas lang po at tibay ng loob sa mga susunod kong hakbangin.

lord, grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change. the courage to change the things that i can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

open letter

an open letter to two beautiful people

hey, i don't know if this is just me or i'm just thinking about it too much. but you seem, to me, distant. you're half as fun as before. you're half as talkative as before. i know there's a secret. and i know what the secret is.
i just want to reassure you that no matter what you want to tell us, you will still be the friend that i have known for almost half my life. believe me, we've been friends for so long that i know you inside out. really. so whatever it is that is bugging you, just spill it out and we'll surely understand. hey, no judgments here... at least on my part. like a father to a son, nothing can surprise me anymore.
so, for you my friend, stop being apprehensive about it. just tell me and we can even talk about it. or we won't even touch the subject, if that's what suits you. but just spill it. i am your friend since elementary and i am your friend now, and i will always be your friend. be true to yourself and we will accept you for everything that you are.

sincerely,
bryan

=============================

hi. i just want to say that as you enter a new chapter of your life, i want you to know that i will always be here for you. we might not exactly have the perfect childhood but hey, blood runs thicker than water. for whatever it is your going through, i am your big brother. i will be the kuya that you didn't have for all your life. ask me anything. tell me anything. i won't pity you. pity is for dogs. but i do understand what you're going through and we will go through it together. after this, springs a new life. we will be there by your side and we will be there to take care of you. take care always and don't let anyone put you down. you are a beautiful yet delicate little flower. be careful and god bless. we all love you.

sincerely,
kuya bryan

ze movie

ze movie
with subtitles and commentaries

as a movie fan (it would be the most appropriate word since i'm neither a buff or a geek) i love the two latest movies i watched.
the curse of the golden (bibe) flower and history boys.
the curse is a massive visual poetry on silver screen. you just gotta love it. and what stuns me (i have no idea if it was purely based on historical facts) is the fact that through all of the character's motives and deception, it's ironic that in the end (SPOILER ALERT!!!) only two are left, the two who started it all, the emperor and the empress. my gulay, this movie kept me on the edge of seat (partly because of the subtitles, i can't eat my burger properly)

historical boys, on the other hand, left us stupid in a good way. amidst it's intellectual exchange of words and sarcasm, i just want to sometimes scream WAIT, SLOWLY PUHHLEASE! (come back again from the top for the second time around) one word, though: NEETCHAAY. lols.

and oh, i lost my wallet just a while back. we were in the cab already making its way to EDSA when the FUCK, WHERE'S MY WALLET drama took place. we instructed the cab driver to go back and wait for me while i go run for only a matter 30 seconds before i reach the cinema (a record i must say). while my legs were shaking and my breath on the verge of exiting my body in a very critical manner, i asked the guard "i left my wallet (breathe, breathe... breathe) can you help me (breathe, breathe) find it? (MORE BREATHS)

"ah baka yun yung nakita diyan, anong kulay?"
"itim"
"halika" while he ushered me to another reception desk and gave me my wallet
"paki-check lang po, bago kayo umalis"
"there's no money to lose, thank you manong..." and i shoook his hand
my gulay, the janitor who found it and the guard who returned should be rewarded in heaven (no money, remember?)

ok that's it for tonight. i know that when i read this post tomorrow, it's still only i who could understand what i wrote here. thanks for decoding.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

YURI!
god bless you always!

ciao!

ang sakit ng ulo ko

ang sakit ng ulo ko

lintik lang ang walang ganti

lintik lang ang walang ganti
naks!

para sa'yo
i fully understand your ground on this case. pero kapag hindi mo kaya panindigan, para saan pa ang mga sinasabi mong "professionalism"? nakakatawa ka nung tinatakbuhan mo ko. wala ka nang kredibilidad dahil sa ginawa mo.

para sa'yo
hindi naman ako galit talaga sa'yo. pareho tayong may kakulangan. pero huwag mo kong asahang maging transparent when you did something behind my back. at please lang, tigilan mo na ang text. i get it, you're guilty. and you even had the audacity to ask me about it?! the nerve!

para sa'yo
don't get me started on grooming when i can smell your disgusting ass from way over the second floor. makes me puke, man! well, you almost did, actually! enough said.

para sa inyo
hindi ko alam kung bakit binuksan ko ang loob ko sa inyo. i thought that when i give out a part of myself, people will appreciate that. yun pala mga buwaya kayo. ahas. and i'm so wrong in giving myself. dead wrong. tapos ang gaganda ng mga ngiti ninyo? i'm dumbfounded when i think about it. hypocrites. plastic.


you've broken part of my spirit.
remember the name. remember the face. it's this same face you will under my shoe.

ciao!